It’s time once again for Fun with Homophones, and we will celebrate FOUR important holidays with the short story: Holiday(s) of Food
Jim felt a tinge of guilt when he saw the small gilt wrapped box sitting next to a cereal bowl of hot oatmeal. He had been so wrapped up in that Big Bang serial that he forgot today was January 26th, Spouses Day. As this was also National Oatmeal Month, they celebrated both holidays today.
His gift for June was hidden next to his power saw. He had purchased a gift certificate for a blueberry pancake breakfast for two. Oatmeal today, blueberry pancakes on January 28th, National Blueberry Pancake Day. Obviously the gift slip was not enough!
January is not a month to waste extra strain on your waist. Your nose knows a happy aroma whiffing through the air from hot oatmeal and fresh blueberry pancakes. One should not err and miss the celebration. Jim laughed and ran his fingers through his hair when he thought about their heirs appreciating that it was at a BBQ restaurant that Jim and June had met when he asked…politely…for her to pass the mustard for his fries.
He passed muster that day, and two years later Miss June became Mrs. June. She still ribs him about his pretty lame pick-up line; something about her not getting her long, pretty plait in her plate of ribs.
Suddenly Jim had an idea. Saying that he ate fast due to a meeting at eight, and could they exchange gifts tonight, Jim kissed June goodbye, and hurried off to ‘work’. In reality, Jim grabbed the blueberry pancake breakfast gift slip and went down the street to the bakery and a gift store.
A short while later, Jim returned home and yelled “surprise!” When June came downstairs she saw a chocolate cake with pretty lit candles. Jim handed her the gift slip envelope, a box, and sang happy birthday to the chocolate cake in honor of National Chocolate Cake Day on the 27th. He told June that his plan was to buy the cake this morning and surprise her. June had seen the ‘hidden’ gift slip, and thus knew he was BSing her. However, she was grateful that Jim had not purchased a kazoo and serenaded her for National Kazoo Day, which is on January 28.
(Holiday(s) of Food, Copyright Steven S. Walsky, January 2015.)