He Totally Disappeared (Flash Fiction, humor)

It was early on the afternoon of the 20th of March, and the office in Biloxi, Mississippi was very busy. The staff could hardly keep up with the phone calls and emails. However, even with all the hustle and bustle, Fred’s empty desk was an attention grabber. For, it was very ‘un-Fred’ for him to be out of the office; besides, someone had seen him that morning at a coffee café drive-thru. Calls to his cell phone had gone unanswered. Then, about 2PM the office manager received a call from the Toronto, Canada police. Fred’s car had been found abandoned in the city, and they found one of Fred’s business cards.

Of course the office manager said that it was not Fred’s car, since there was no way for Fred to have driven to Toronto in a few short hours. To this, the police officer responded, “The license plate is from Mississippi, and registered to him!” The stunned office manager asked the officer to wait a moment while he spoke to the coworker who had seen Fred. The coworker told the officer that it was definitely Fred at the coffee café. “Look, we have the vehicle!” The coworker dropped the phone.

Two days later, still no Fred. It was if he had totally disappeared from planet Earth. The Toronto Police had contacted the FBI for assistance, and Fred’s fellow office personnel were questioned. Tony remembered Fred had said something about interesting colored lights reflecting off his bedroom window, but there was no lit object outside when Fred investigated. Another employee said that Fred had recently complained that he could not find some clothes that he had hung in the closet a week earlier. While the coworkers did not think these happenings were important, the investigators did not seem surprised by them.

It did seem odd to the coworkers that a search of Fred’s desk by the investigators revealed a clipped together small stack of newspaper and magazine articles that all dealt with unidentified flying objects. Fred had never mentioned UFOs. It was then that Sally mentioned that Fred seemed to have become somewhat nerves when leaving work in the evening, and had started stealthily looking over his shoulder up to the sky.

With months passing, and still no sign of Fred, the company decided to hang a picture of Fred in the building lobby commemorating the day he disappeared. “What a coincidence,” commented a visitor, “he disappeared on March 20th, Extraterrestrial Abductions Day!”

(He Totally Disappeared, © Steven S. Walsky, March 2018.)

Extraterrestrial Abductions Day is always celebrated on March 20th.